What I Learned From My 30s

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I am a mother to an adult son, a manager of a large taxi company in Boston, sister, daughter, friend, and I am 40.  I thought when I was 21, that once I hit 40 my life would be over.  Actually, that is way off, I actually feel as if my life is just beginning.  Growing as a real woman in my 30s, learning who I was and who I am going to be. There are many lessons that I have learned from my younger days that will help me later in life.  So I thought I would share it:

1. Love and accept yourself- completely

I truly believe that if I had accepted the good, the bad and the ugly about myself at a younger age, I would have avoided many of the wrong decisions that I made in my life.  Once you know who you are inside, you begin to accept and love yourself fully.  Once you truly love yourself from the inside, you are able to love and accept others.

2. Feed your soul

Whatever your passion, or whatever you enjoy in your life, make sure you feed your soul with what ever inspires you.  For me, it is snowboarding.  If you are not sure what your passion is, try new thingss and find new activities until you find a few that give you that feeling of warmth, freedom, excitement inside of your heart.

3. Find a strong support network

Since I was 4 years old, I have tried to do everything in my life on my own.  Never asking for help.  I realized later that I needed to have a strong network of friends and family, who I trust and who make me feel safe.  I am now able to ask for help, if and when I need it.

4. Be authentic

During some of the harder times in my life, I wore a smiling mask on my face no matter what I was going through.  Once you show others you have ups and downs and real struggles in life just like they do, you become more honest to others and they will love you more for that.

5. Live your life for you

A huge part of my growing years was taken up by taking care of everyone else and neglecting myself.  You can not make everyone in your life happy. Just try to make yourself happy and life will get easier.

6. Don’t compromise too much

Compromise is required in any close relationships because we are all different and come from different worlds.  Never give up your wants and needs ever.

7. Travel as much as you can

Being a young teenage mom, I did not have the finances or time to travel.  This is probably my biggest regrets in life.  But as my son grew and my income grew, I was able to travel and to see new places and have new experiences that have changed me for the better.  I have been to a few countries, and have taken something back from every trip I have ever been on.  I snowboarded in Chile in August and that trip taught me to let work go after 5, not to bring it home to your house or family.  I am lucky that I have found a career that has allowed me to travel, it has made me a better manager.

8. Save for the future

This should be the one thing I should have done when I was younger.  SAVE MONEY!!

9. Forgive yourself and others

I have learned, to forgive and forget what others have done or not done.  Once I realized to let go of pain from others, it made me feel more powerful and stronger.  Once you are able to truly let go of past hurts made by yourself or others, you see life and love in a positive light.

10. Learn to say NO

This is the best thing that I have learned, to say no and not feel bad about it.  I always tried to make people happy and that is impossible.

11. Stop caring what others think of you

When I was a young girl, I really cared what people thought of me.  Once I realized that what others think of me is really none of my business I was able to live life with right motives instead of wrong ones.  Once you are able to be yourself and forget caring what other people think about you, life gets better.

 

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